“these things”

by: jason.

I am not obsessed, I am driven.  I believe in the poetic things life has shown me that brings out the uniqueness in people.  I have a blind faith in all things until it is too late for it not to hurt more than it ever should.  I love love.  I am a romantic; whether you describe it as hopeless or stupid, I am a romantic none the less.  I will do anything for true love, even and especially give it up.  I will always watch cartoons because they bring me a simple peace.  I have done things in life that define my personality but they do not define me as a person.  I know I am not the best at anything except at being me.  I know myself better than anything in the world.  I let people take advantage of me because if you know they are, then they are not. I am most happy with a cup of coffee and a friend to talk to.  I earn money to live and to give, not to collect.  I have realized that there is only one thing worse than not knowing something and that is knowing.  I have witnessed other people blame me for things I have said and done only because they realized that it spotlighted their shortcomings.  I am the most loyal friend to anyone who would have me.  I have found real love at least once and I am sure of it; I also know I have probably found it other times and squandered it.  I am constantly being pulled in so many directions that people end up being hurt but none more than me.  I do things everyday that other people wish they could do.  I don’t do anything that anyone else couldn’t do better.  I have my opinions about everything but I summon fact and first hand experiences rather than offer a far-fetched theory.  I speak in relative terms way too often and it is just as often that it is confused with ‘beating around the bush’.  I have witnessed that people around me have a difficult time believing that someone like me exists; someone that expresses definite(s) that do not alter over time.  I enjoy drawing pictures and creating artwork that brings others joy and hope.  I will not play games that offer the opportunity for no concise winner; I may not win at something but at least I know where I stand.  I have learned that games should never be confused with intimate relationships, love of any kind is not a game; as soon as it looks like a game to me, I will bow out.  I know that it is never too late.  I know you must always say what you need to before it’s too late because too late comes before you could even imagine.  I know nothing is impossible, just improbable.  I know life will always find a way to bring you what you need regardless of the obstacles you put in it’s path.  I know my direction in life.  I know why my direction will never parallel anyone else’s.  I know I will be alone and I am an unhappy person most of the time because of it.  I also know that no matter what I know about my life and the way things will turn out, there is always a chance that something wonderfully unexpected happens that changes everything and that chance is specifically what keeps me going every single day.

These things in our life that we know to be true; everyone has them, few people follow them or will admit them to themselves let alone other people.  I think it’s important to understand how they relate to everyday things instead of just knowing them individually.  See, everyone will take them out of context unless you know me…then when you put them together, these things are without a doubt…me.

You may be going through life right at this moment with heavy things hanging over your head; you may be keeping them all to yourself because it’s just easier to keep going through your life the way you are instead of really understanding how to move on.  You have to keep moving; if you don’t move forward, one day you will wake up to realize you missed the most important adventures life has to offer.  It’s fine to love something or someone; you should-but love grows every single day and if you find that it hasn’t been…you really should figure out why not.  Sometimes it grows in the strangest of ways…and sometimes you may not notice how it grows but that is why you have to look once in a while instead of simply guessing that it has.

I Love you all-thank you for reading.

-me